Friday, January 1, 2016

Fire Monkey 2016

Those of you who know me personally know I am going through an incredible transformation in my life. The last 8 months, I opened my own business, moved in with my partner of 2 years, got an apartment in NW Portland.

Now, mostly of all that has changed.

I've put all of my energy, savings, blood, sweat, passion, and tears into opening a studio in Portland in August 2015. The studio abruptly closed two days ago due the landlord raising the rent and a new yoga company coming inthat can pay more.

My partner and I decided that we could come together to make it through the birth of this new career "baby", turns out he is at the brink of his own spiritual growth that must be independently explored. With the news of the studio closing, I also realized that this is the time he has to move out and find himself. As I watch him pack up his things in the apartment, I am overfilled with intense sorrow and solid duty to the journey of the human soul. I love him with everything I know, which is why I have to let him go.

I reflect on my intentions to 'set roots' in Portland, a town that has invited me so graciously into this beautiful community back in 2012. The decision to run my own company full tilt, and to be a loving partner has revealed incredible truths about my capacity for commitment, my capacity for love, my honesty in business, and my choices to continue moving forward. I have found that being a studio owner is a labor of love as I am the soul to bear the relationships that walk in the door. I have found that being a true girlfriend means to surrender, to know deep down love prevails, even when it is hard to cut the chords and see clearly the need for each other to be independent... and grow.

I share this with you as the year changes into 2016. As my eyes are wet with uncertainty, and my heart is confused with past and present moments, both grieving and shaping. I share this with to remind us all that growing can be painful. And this is the time. To remember that we are loved, holding space and a smile for the future to come