It's been years since I've contributed works to this blog, and I'm happy to have returned. We can all agree so much has happened over the last 5 years, in our global experience as well as our personal experiences. The rollercoaster ride of life never ceases to amaze me, and keeps me on the edge of my seat, watching the whirling images from my past catching up to the hopes and dreams of my future. It all comes spiraling down in one moment of truth. That I have fallen to being pregnant, not by my choice, or intentional planning, but to the intervention of divine force that has created a situation to which I must step up to something greater than myself. I can admit that throughout my life, I've had the privilege to yield experiences for growth and learning. However, one thing always remained constant, freedom. Many times when humans breakthrough their shadow sides, it is because they are forced to face themselves in a situation that doesn't bend, break, or yield to their selfish desires. Difficult and mucky times can often spawn the greatest truths of perseverance and show us our own shortcomings to which we make a decision to push through and succeed. Looking back on my life, I manifested many situations to continue to teach me, and align me with behavior that I hold up to be righteous and intentional. However, even in those moments, I have also padded myself with freedom. Freedom to explore into or beyond the struggles was my way to get through some things I didn't want to face. I am a magical manifestor, therefore, when I was in a situation I didn't like, I could easily change my experience and create a different one. Not all humans have that luxury. However, I am looking at my luxury as a crutch as well. Have I fortified my backbone to accept the truth? Or, have I created a life to which is constantly reshaping itself around what I desire? Now, with this baby coming, my heart and soul is telling me it is time. There is no running. There is no shaping. There is only freedom of love and joy developing through this bond of me and little one.
